Thanks to all of you, and your wacky cold cures, I am going to race tomorrow.

I am still floored by the outpouring of remedies and good wishes the Twitter community offered me in the 48 hours leading up to my Ironman tomorrow. I was already depressed by tearing up my knee and not being able to work out at all for the last four weeks. But, when I got sick and developed a nasty fever, I have to say, I was losing hope.

The update is that my fever has broken. I still sound and look like I have an incontinent squirrel living in my sinus cavities. However, with no fever, my doctor has cleared me to hit the starting line tomorrow!

I would be remiss if I didn't recap many of the cures and treatments the Twitter and the FriendFeed folks offered both publicly and privately. I am grateful to all of you, but must say that some of you frankly scared me. Though, I guess my Twitter begged for lunacy in the replies:

 

"I have an Ironman in 48 hours and am still running a fever. Hit me with your best cold remedies. (Forget science. Give me myth and hype.)"

Oh my, you did not disappoint in a few buckets. First, the herbs, vegetables, vitamins, supplements:

@chriscoit -- Matcha green tea is always good
 @olivermarks -- boil onion and garlic, drink. Tons of vitamin c 1000mg per hour.
@davidbadash -- Echinacea. Lots of it. With Vitamin C, & a ton of fruit juice - the real stuff. Fresh. And those Zinc drops, & aspirin/advil & sleep
@oudiantebi -- Once heard fron a really old lady that Apple cider vinegar works
@joshspear -- go to whole foods and get this shit called 'Cold Snap'... I'm telling you, whatever is in there, it WORKS
@[direct] --zinc gluconate
@timoreilly -- Try black elderberry and plum flower brand gan mao ling
@joseph_di_p -- chicken soup with lots of garlic
@rachelannyes -- try Red Root extract. wow, it's bitter.
@wordstrumpet -- tons of Vitamin C, Airborne, and Cold-Eze.  The combo works every time for me.  I've also heard good things about garlic.
@stevemann -- zicam zinc works really well but u need to take it religiously. C won't do any good imho. Only for prevention. Chicken soup
FF/@tad -- Raw garlic, but you shoulda used that a few days ago.  Not gonna help.
FF/@johnpiercy -- Echinchea
FF/@ha3rvey -- Find a Thai restaurant and have as much Tom Kha Gai as you can manage.
FF/@sfwahine -- the Wellness Formula tablets from Source Naturals work wonders
FF/@shareme -- drink pickle juice
@maryhodder -- juice from 1 lemon, slice up abt 2" of ginger in 12 mug-steep w/ hot water 10 min, remove ginger, add 2T honey. lather rince repeat

Not going to lie to you. A couple hundred bucks at Whole Foods later, I tried most of these.

The next group of remedies are the alcohol-based ones. These might be some of my favorite examples oral tradition:

@runvmc -- Shot of 151 in a cup of hot tea. Drink it down and get under a pile of blankets. Wake up good as new.
@svalleydiva -- this may sound strange but lemon, honey, brandy mixed with some hot tea.@bettinatizzy -- Tequila is the Mexican way; steambaths is the Oaxacan way
@hol_kinz -- best remedy: a shot (or two) of jack daniels.
@larsz -- perhaps elder flower and elder berry.. or try cocktail of two doses of antihistamin, 10mg codeine and 500 mg ASA, kills symptoms 12hrs [Codeine?! Hmm. Haven't read the rules, but there has to be something in there about dosing codeine...]
@tywbooth -- Scotch. The alcohol kills germs....Or at least that's what I'd like to believe
@[direct] -- equal parts theraflu and bourbon every 4 to 6 hours
@[direct] -- [redacted] once got through a sick week of SXSW with constant shots of tequila
@orions55 -- Kelly Kid says you can drink away a fever---divide your body weight 10 and drink that many beers.
FF/@isthistupid -- much orange juice and soup as you can get down in an evening, drink two hot totties (hot tea w/ honey, lemon, and whiskey) before bed, and sleep at least 10 hours. Courtesy of my great-grandmother
FF/@stretta -- Guinness [I lived in Ireland, and of course they swear by this over there.]

 One presumably sane and wise person told me I was stupid for still considering racing: 

@tweetipfh -- fever : listen to your body & your torn meniscus & decide if pushing through 2 the other side is worth it...

But, then again, a couple of you essentially called me a pussy:

@dickc -- you ironman people are always complaining. "Oh, i have to run a marathon now, oh my head hurts, oh i have a 103 fever". Suck it up.
@orions55 -- men's vitamins every 4 hours, a quart of fresh squeezed OJ, a salad and dayquil.  Or a generous heap of vagisil

 I guess my Twitter followers are a self-selecting group from among my friends...

A few of you suggested physical undertakings:

@[direct] -- Try sleeping, instead of Twittering :) [I am not sure how you Twitter, but it really isn't that draining for me.]
@amitp -- maybe you should sleep instead of twittering
@chrishedgecock -- steam room. 1hr.
@atulacharya -- Hot shower and a good night's sleep works for me. 
@parislemon -- cut off your arm, you'll forget all about that cold [Yeah, but it might slow down my already pathetic swim] 

  
However, despite all of the wisdom offered above, there were a few that stood out from the rest: 

@stanlee86 -- Use your proton canons to help you! [Ummm...okay. Will check with the boys in the lab.]
@bryanpower -- is it a cold or a fever? different magic trix depending [I feared replying might have inspired some voodoo from Bryan. :)]
FF/@kennethn -- Good fever cure: do an Ironman [Note to self: Norton is hard core... or maybe dumb like I am.]
FF/@peterch -- have a ton of sex

And, the most effective treatment, and the one that surely will get me to the line tomorrow:

FF/@sfwahine -- more cowbell? [Indeed, it was the only prescription for my fever.]

All right, a final check of my bags and I am off to Napa for the race. Thanks for all of the encouragement and good wishes. By the way, while I am not racing for a cause (other than personal survival) a couple of dear friends are raising money for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society for their races. If you are at all inspired by the idiocy of Ironman events, considering giving to Minnie Ingersoll's fundraising campaign here as she preps to hammer out Ironman Louisville later this month. And, if you would like to encourage Crystal Engligh, author of Virgin Triathlete, as she attempts her first Olympic distance, donate here.

Thanks, everyone. I will try to Twitter from the course! (Well, from everywhere but the water. Still haven't figured that one out yet.)

Comments

[Keller]

I'll attempt to feed a constant variety of well timed, inspiring movie lines tomorrow---good luck.

[Justine]

Good luck :)

[gregorylent]

the best one was mine, relax you'll be fine ..

but you would not have had this blog post, so, another victory for anxiety ..

have a ball

[Michael Mucha]

Congratulations Chris!

Met you at a couple of bdowney's parties while you were still at GOOG (that ought to narrow it down quite a bit). Hadn't seen your blog in a bit, pleasant surprise to see you've joined the ironman club (I'm a bit of a pied piper for this sort of foolishness). At last, a convincing answer to, "What is Twitter really useful for?" :)

Congratulations again

[Michael Mucha]

Congratulations Chris!

Met you at a couple of bdowney's parties while you were still at GOOG (that ought to narrow it down quite a bit). Hadn't seen your blog in a bit, pleasant surprise to see you've joined the ironman club (I'm a bit of a pied piper for this sort of foolishness). At last, a convincing answer to, "What is Twitter really useful for?" :)

Congratulations again

[Matt Metzgar]

This is a little late, but here's my best cold remedy: do a water-only fast. When animals are ill, they generally fast. This allows the body to focus on repair and maintenance rather than digestion.